I love to talk.
This will not come as a surprise to anyone who knows me.
As a child, I could – and would – talk for hours. About anything. About everything. Most of the time, however, I didn’t talk about anything truly worth talking about; I often talked just because I liked to talk.
Eventually I grew up. I attended a public speaking and debate workshop that led to my ongoing involvement in the Institute for Cultural Communicators (I will blog more about ICC later). ICC taught me to speak purposefully and reminded me that as a Christian, I have the greatest message of all to share with the world: the gospel of Jesus Christ. I became passionate about public speaking and welcomed opportunities to speak from the platform, not because I wanted the spotlight, but because I understood how influential standing behind a microphone can be.
But a recent experience reminded me of another dimension of influential communication that I had almost forgotten.
I found myself—by chance, happenstance, coincidence, or the providence of God, you decide—in a conversation with someone who minutes before had been a complete stranger. We connected almost instantly and quickly moved beyond small talk into a discussion about our common faith in, and love for, Christ.
We talked for well over an hour. Actually, they talked and I listened.
Yes, you read that right. I didn’t say hardly anything. For over an hour.
Contrary to my nature, this situation didn’t strike me as odd. I was perfectly content to be “all ears.”
And when the other person finished talking, they looked me straight in the eye and said, “Thank you for listening.”
I was shocked. I managed a polite reply, but in that instant I realized that I had just learned a crucial lesson about communication that I had all but forgotten.
Sometimes, I get so caught up in my passion and love for public speaking that I forget one of the most important components of communication…listening.
Because I kept my mouth shut that night and simply listened, my new friend walked away from the conversation knowing I cared about them.
Maybe you like public speaking. Maybe you don’t. Maybe you’re a big talker. Maybe you’re a quiet person. Wherever you fall on the spectrum, I encourage you to take the time to listen. Really listen.
Because listening can change a life just as much as speaking.